Italian lessons in authenticity: by Emma Bird

September 11, 2007 · by Joanna Paterson · in

What’s your name? What are you eating? Why are you here?

Those were just some of the questions that the two-year-old at the table next to ours was bombarding us with while we were waiting for our meal to arrive in our favourite restaurant.

Were she in the UK or the US, her parents would probably have tried to sssshhhhsh her up, telling her she shouldn’t talk to strangers and that she should be a good girl and clear her plate as quickly as possible.

But, luckily, she wasn’t in the UK or the US so her parents were more than happy for her to chat away to us as she slowly spooned her pasta into her mouth, smearing her face with tomato sauce in the process. She was in Italy and already learning the immeasurable pleasure of lingering over dinner, combining fine food with good conversation. And judging by the huge smile on her chubby toddler face, she was having a wonderful time. As were we.

There were no airs or graces. No one trying to be something they weren’t. Just acceptance of the situation and people joining in the conversation no matter what their age or status.

But it wasn’t a one-off. It’s repeated all over Italy. Day in, day out. In every town and every piazza. In fact, it is one of the reasons I fell in love with the country in the first place.

It’s no secret that my Italian was rubbish when I first lived in Italy and that my knowledge of the culture was way below par. Nevertheless, I was astounded and comforted at how quickly I was embraced into the fold and made to feel as important as everyone else – no matter that my new-found friends had to concentrate hard to make out what I was saying in Italian in between my stuttering and stammering and bad grammar mistakes.

That scene was played out again just over a year later in Bologna where I was spending my third year of university abroad. Again, I was welcomed and appreciated for being ‘me’. ‘Me’ with the bad grammar. ‘Me’ from England. ‘Me’ who couldn’t start the day (and still can’t) until I’d drunk a strong espresso. ‘Me’ with the smile always on her face. And lots more ‘mes’ beside. I didn’t have to be anyone I wasn’t. I was ‘me’ and it felt great.

Ten years later, I’m still in Italy and that authencity is as present now as it was then. As far as I like to think, my ‘me’ shines through into my writing, too. This is how I am. This is my life. And this is how I write. I’m proud of being me and love the life I live so why should I hide it? There are so many blogs in the blogosphere – over 100 milion. So why should I be someone I’m not? After all, if people don’t like who I am and the way I write, they can always go elsewhere.

In the meantime, I’ll continue to laugh and joke with the little girl who has already learnt the art of authenticity and celebrate being ‘me’.

Emma Bird writes about all things Italian at the HowToItaly blog.  It’s a great place to hang out if you want a taste of authentic writing and authentic living – or to find out how to land your dream job or set up your own business in La Dolce Vita.  For more on what Emma’s learned from her life in the Bel Paese why not check our her “five things I’ve learned since living in Italy…” series

Emma is guest authoring at Confident Writing as part of the September focus on writing with authenticity

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