I asked for some advice a while back about how to solve one of the tricky blog equations that presents itself once a blog starts to become more ‘successful’.
My particular challenge was how to continue to find the time and energy to respond to the flow of comments that come in.
I’m still working through my own answers to some of these questions (informed by your words and your wisdom). I’ll be sharing some of the conclusions on where I’ve got to, and where I’m going soon – along with some of the thought processes (in case I’m wildly off track, so you can help to keep me right.)
Meantime I wanted to share some of the suggestions and perspectives that you wonderful members of the Confident Writing community came up with in the comment box.
I know this particular challenge is one that many bloggers face, so I hope that the thoughts shared below will help you solve some of your own tricky blog equations.
How to Solve Tricky Blog Equations: by the Confident Writing Community
1. Adjust the time you take to respond to each comment
Accept that some comments don’t require a detailed response, and indeed that many commenters aren’t looking for or expecting a response.
Answer in batches if it’s easier and less time consuming.
Reply to some of the most important points, but not each and every comment.
[I understand the reasons behind this last point but am wary of it myself - it can quickly look exclusive and cliquey]
2. Reduce the frequency of your blogging
Reduced frequency = less posts = fewer comments.
Most people follow through a feed reader or email notifications, so they’re still going to get your posts if your schedule becomes less regular. They don’t need to remember to check.
Remember that many readers might be glad to have less material to read and thank you for reducing the frequency.
Sometimes when bloggers post less, I’m interested in reading them more – I look forward to their occasional treats ~ Brad Shorr, Word Sell
3. Find other ways to value the contribution of readers
Use things like the top commenters plug in to highlight those who are contributing the most.
[There are lots of ways you can highlight the contribution of your community - I explored some of them here: 10 practical ways to boost blog comments and conversation. I have to say - unless they're automated through a plugin they're all going to take more time and energy than just replying to comments. Though you will get other benefits through a richer conversation and a strong sense of community. It's worth doing if that's the purpose of your blog - see more of that below.]
4. Get clear on how important comments are (or aren’t) for your blog
Not all blogs are the same. Think about the role comments and conversation play in your blogging – not so much what the ‘experts’ say blogging success looks like, but what it means to you – what motivates you to write, to find new ideas, to spend the time managing and developing the site, to keep blogging through the inevitable dips.
Comments are a key part of why I blog. I know that – and it was good to hear some of you saying that.
a big part of your blog is the reader interaction. I’m sure I’m not alone in coming back to read the other comments, I’m interested in not only what you write, but in other people’s reactions and even in your responses ~ Bo Mackison, Seeded Earth
But that doesn’t mean it’s going to be the same for you.
How big a part do you want comments to play? How do those interactions help / hinder you from getting to where you want to be?
5. Keep things in perspective
Give yourself some grace.
Be kind to yourself.
Look for ways to get back into a better balance between writing and comments, between blogging and life.
Be kind to yourself.
6. Come back to your blogging intention
Take a fresh look at your blogging intention – both what you set out to do, and what’s behind your blog now.
Ask yourself what kind of blogging you’re doing. Is it information giving, or relationship building?
If you are blogging to build valuable relationships with people, then the top priority is the interaction – the two-way dialogue.
Here, comments and your response to comments ARE the blog to the extent that your content is aimed at facilitating this interaction – this exchange of value via relationship-building actions ~ Robin Dickinson, Radsmarts
7. Encourage a new blogging etiquette
I’m so intrigued by this idea from Leah Pauls!
Maybe there can be a box for responders to check if they expect or desire a response. Or maybe a “no response needed” box. Or maybe a new rule of blogging etiquette should be that commentors (new word?) say “thank you, no response is necessary.”
What do you think… is that something that individual bloggers can cultivate… or we can collectively start to do?
8. Give yourself permission to slow down and stop replying
If you’re so successful you have thousands of comments coming in… you need to give yourself permission to stop replying to them all 
With one vital caveat: So long as you’ve thought about how that slowing down and stopping fits in with your blogging intention (see point 6), and your own definition of blogging ‘success’.
9. Work out what you’re going to do
So, what are you going to do with all this wonderful advice?
~ Karen Wallace, The Calm Space
Talking about it’s one thing… working out the solution remains the tricky bit.
Or the easy bit.
Because at the end of the day: it’s your blog, and it’s your intention.
How you make that work is up to you.
~~~
Thanks everyone for the contributions to this question. If it’s an issue you’re grappling with I recommend you dip into the comment box below the original post on blogging equations. You’ll get lots of food for thought there.
Meantime, any further pearls of wisdom before I move into the plan of what I’m actually going to do?
Work with Joanna and learn to express yourself with confidence. Online classes to free the inner writer. Get help writing the pages that you need for an effective presence on the web.
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Joanna, All of this is incredibly helpful. Once again you demonstrate the idea power of an active blog community. I really like Leah Pauls’ idea of “NRN” , No Response Necessary. I know I would really appreciate that as a blogger because I do feel an obligation to respond to most comments – even when I sense the commenter doesn’t expect one. The NRN convention would also be great for email.
Brad Shorr´s last blog ..4 Blog Typography Tips that Do Nothing for SEO
Joanna, this is extremely helpful. I too am working through these issues – blogging frequency, comment response. It is very helpful to work through it as a community. While we all have to find our own fit, I am glad that we are questioning the old “rules” and defining success on our own terms.
Brad, when I was in Corporate we used no response needed quite frequently along with NFM (No further message) when a subject line covered the response. It was very helpful!
Karen Swim´s last blog ..You’re Lazy and You Look Fat in Those Pants
Joanna, it’s funny how we can see, hear, or read something that we have encountered before but the next time BAM…the brain connects the dots and we have an “ah ha” moment. Sometimes it’s a matter of getting missing information or experience before the pieces fall in place and sometimes it’s simply a matter of readiness. For me, I think it was both – so thank you, dear friend, thank you for the “ah has” in your post!
Jeanne Male´s last blog ..Are You Normal? Fitting-in vs Being Authentic (part 2)
Your common sense approach to solve the equation has given me a lot to think about as I reconsider some blogging choices. As always, thank you, Joanna.
Shari Smothes´s last blog ..november writing fun 2009
Joanna — These a very all very helpful suggestions about comments. The question that really touched me was:
Ask yourself what kind of blogging you’re doing. Is it information giving, or relationship building?
It made me think about my own blog and what I want via comments. I often let my ego get caught up in the number of comments I get, rather than the quality of comments.
While new readers are always welcome, I like the interaction with regular readers on my site. I feel like I know them and their comments are special to me. It’s obvious that they took the time to really read the post.
I try to return this favor and if I can’t give something of value about a post in the comment box, I often will not leave a comment. This may mean that I have fewer people comment on my site (the quid for pro approach), but at least I’m trying to be authentic.
Thank you for this post:~)
Sara Healy´s last blog ..The Journey Begins: Part One
Hi Joanna. This makes me think of blogging as a constant juggling routine. Even when we’re out and about, I imagine for most bloggers anyway, that we’re not all that far away from our blogs. It really is a challenge to balance this; especially when it is something a person truly enjoys doing. I’ve found that ugly “obligation” finger wagging at me about reading other blogs and that has puzzled me, because these are all blogs I enjoy reading. But, I’ve realized it’s because I just need to set aside some specific time for that; time where I’m not feeling like I “should” be doing something else.
Davina´s last blog ..New Lives: Stories of Rescued Dogs
This is nice. I now have my theme for the “Week in Review” article for 2 weeks for now. I can definitely riff on this material, extensively. All that graduate education in engineering. I knew it would come in useful someday!
I’ve found that the best way to keep the big picture in sight is to get far enough away from the material to keep it all in view. Sometimes, this means I need to go camping instead of writing blog posts.
Dave Doolin | Website In A Weekend´s last blog ..My Eyeballs Are Bleeding – And How I Write Thousands of Words Every Week
Thanks, Joanna. You’re making my life easier. Happy Blogging.
I’ve only just begun blogging (and the only comment I got so far turned out to be spam…) but this has been an inspiring read and I’m sure to come back to it from time to time as my blog develops. Thanks Joanna!
Alexandra´s last blog ..Rezept: Andijviestamppot (Endiviensalatstampftopf)
Brad I’m glad you enjoyed it – I felt I learned so much from the ideas and suggestions that flowed in, I wanted to share them. I like the NRN idea too… and yes, can also see how it might work on Twitter!
Karen, absolutely, here’s to defining success on our own terms!
Jeanne what a delightful response… so glad to have helped provide the BAM opportunity!
Shari it is all about the choices we make isn’t it? In blogging as in life
Sara I think authentic commenting is really important. I made a deal with myself early on that I’d only ever leave a comment when I felt a genuine sense of connection, not because I felt I ‘ought’ to. It’s meant I’ve always enjoyed the time I’ve spent in conversations with people all over the place. It’s a good point about asking yourself what you want from comments – that’s one I’ll ask myself bluntly too. Thanks.
Davina you’re right, it is a constant juggling act. It’s very hard to switch off the blogging mind… but then, do we really want to? It’s part of our creativity
I know what you mean about the reading and the commenting… the only solution I’ve found is to do less (mark as unread, mark as unread, don’t comment, don’t comment) until I get to the natural point where I want to again, rather than feeling that I should.
BTW one of the great things about twitter is that it never feels like a should – always a chance to connect and play. How about you? Is there something we can learn from that and apply to blogging too? (Question partly to self
)
Dave what a great encapsulation of the thinking process – to get far enough away that you can keep it all in view. Going camping sounds like a great alternative to writing blog posts, though don’t you find the time away justs leads to more ideas for more posts?
Alexandra my pleasure, and I hope you get a non sp*m comment soon
Joanna to add my two cents: (1) I like the NRN tag, that would be a great addition to standard blogging comment functionality.
(2) I would also add that blogging is taking the “in person” relationship to an online world where you can reply on your time and continue the conversation. Especially where we are located around the world, multiple time zones, ‘real time’ response takes on a different meaning. I believe most of us who have been here a while recognize that a ‘real thoughtful’ response later is better than a quick one immediately. (Here is where the NRN can help too!). Conversations can linger over a post for a while just like they do when we do take ‘the blog off the blog’ and sit over a cup of coffee (or two or three) in the coffee shop.
Steve Sherlock´s last blog ..WGBH canceling folk? Say it ain’t so!
Hi Joanna – these are great tips. As you say, not all comments need a response but only responding to a selected view can give the impression you favour some commenters over others.
Recently I got round that by thanking everyone for their comments – then only replying to folk who’d gone into more detail, or had questions. It’s too early to say if this is working yet though.
Steve that’s a great addition about ‘real thoughtful’. I’m realising that I find it hard to respond quickly to all the comments that come in, but I do still enjoy and want to respond to all the comments… and to do it with thought. Sometimes that means taking a bit longer, but I think it’s worth it if the genuine exchange of ideas (thoughts, hopes, fears) is what we’re after
Cath that’s an approach that can work well, esp if the blogger is clearly a kind and thoughtful person. I know someone who does that in response to her comments and it works perfectly fine – there’s something about the way she writes that allows us to see she’s listening to and gaining from the feedback and comments, which makes it motivating and rewarding to carry on chipping in. I think I should try it a bit more as one of the ways to give myself a bit of breathing space
I generally answer comments in batches, makes life much easier for me.
Barbara Ling, Virtual Coach´s last blog ..Simple way to help YOU get MORE traffic to your website/blog
Hi, Joanna. I often feel like I am rollerbladding and trying to keep my balance with my business and social media responsibilities and joys. Your post consistantly come at just the right time, offering wise assistance to keep my self from falling on m tushy. Thank you for your generosity and the comments/replies from your other readers. I am most grateful. Sheila
Barbara it’s a habit I’m trying to cultivate too
Sheila I know just what you mean by rollerblading
But at least that still puts us in control of our speed and direction, doesn’t it? 
This is really helpful for someone starting out. Its nice to know its not required that every comment must be answered!
marshall´s last blog ..Solar Panel Array, My real life example
Marshall I think it’s worth reminding ourselves there aren’t rules set in stone… but also that actions do have consequences in terms of the atmosphere you create on your blog, and the relationships you can establish. It’s all about the intention really, and what you hope to achieve through your blogging endeavours.